When two people become married or in a relationship their ideal is to accommodate each other in what ever way they can. So where are the answers to be found? Possibly in the lust of our own self-satisfaction? When each partner is fulfilling the needs of each other, the relationship runs smooth. Your marriage or relationship doesn’t necessarily have to end because you had an affair.
If you made the mistake of cheating, you may be asking the question, “Now What?” Even though you caused your partner much heartache and anger, your marriage or relationship can survive if you are truly sorry for your decision to cheat and not just having regrets that you got caught.
To rebuild your marriage or relationship and heal the hurt and mistrust your partner feels after you cheated, you will have to accomplish these steps as well as forgiveness when cheated on.
Stop Cheating. Really end it Don’t have contact with the other person.
Stop Lying. Quit making excuses for the affair. Don’t try to justify your adultery. There is no justification for cheating.
Accept Responsibility. Don’t blame your partner. You had a choice. You could have ended your marriage or relationship before cheating, but you decided to have an affair. That’s on your shoulders alone. Apologize to your partner.
Make a Decision. Decide if you want to stay married. Find out if your partner wants to stay married. If you both want to save your marriage or relationship, your marriage or relationship isn’t doomed.
Be Honest. You must be honest, both with yourself and with your partner if you want to move forward.
Keep Your Promises. If you say you are going to be somewhere, be there. If you say you are going to do something, do it. Be dependable and don’t break your promises. You can’t help your partner rebuild trust if you are not dependable.
Be Open. Your partner’s trust level is low. Be open to letting your partner know where you are, who you are with, etc. Don’t be secretive.
Give Your Partner Some Space. A “timeout” if emotions are running high helps alot. This way he/she will have the time alone to deal with the hurt. This doesn’t mean you or your partner will take off for a week or a weekend.
Spend Time With Your Partner. Along with letting your partner have some time alone, you need to have together time too. Plan date nights and when your partner is ready have an evening or weekend away together.
Be Patient. Don’t expect your partner to trust you again right away. It will take time to regain your partner’s trust.
Agree to Get Professional Help. If your partner wants to see a marriage or relationship counselor or a TRUSTED PASTOR, say yes. Saying no shows you really aren’t serious about rebuilding your marriage or relationship. You need to be open to discussing and identifying issues and problems in your own personal life and in your marriage.
Accept the End of Your Marriage or Relationship. Even if you stay together, your marriage or relationship as you knew it ended with the affair. Build your new marriage or relationship together with honesty and love and look to your future together, not to the past. When your partner is ready, consider renewing your marriage vows to show your commitment to staying faithful.
Be Willing to Forgive. You need to forgive yourself. This doesn’t mean you can let yourself off the hook but you don’t need to carry buckets of guilt for the rest of your life.
TRUE MEANING OF LOVE 